How does the Russian husband Japanese wife eyes

How does the Russian husband Japanese wife eyes

Not so long ago I got an unusual book in hand. I wrote its simple Japanese woman Keiko Ivanov, and therefore have the same cover was enough to break my templates to shreds. The book is called "Haraso-na Hibi". Or, if in Russian and preserving pun - "Harosie days." It is written in the form of comics, which tells about the difficult life of Keiko Ivanova with her Russian husband. Being distracted from the topic, I note that the Japanese are able to do all of comics, even from a textbook on civil law.

In fact, the knowledge of the average Japanese of Russia quite a few have gone forward from Herodotus with his Hyperborea. Japanese mental universe to the north of Hokkaido begins a black hole, which stretches about Germany's eastern border, where the light is turned back on. When meeting with the Japanese, I sometimes invite them to guess where I was. At the same time I give a hint: the closest to the country of Japan. It would be better not to give, because at this point the interlocutor brain performs an illegal operation and is forced to close. Variants of "Korea", "China" and "Taiwan" bad fit with my appearance. Variants of "USA", "Australia" and "New Zealand" - with a school geography course. At about the time the vague memories of geography at risk to move into the flimsy knowledge of astronomy, I is inexpressible mercy and say: "Russia".

Russia - a "cold" and "vodka". It is questions like "and the summer you do there?". This is Putin, Cheburashka and KGB finally. To prevent the other party completely losing face, gently, I note that for the average Russian Japan - this is where the samurai in the company of geisha eating sushi. But the fact remains that on the nearest neighbor Japanese do not know almost anything, even the near neighborhood goes past them. We still excusable ignorance: we have neighbors from Norway to North Korea, do remember them all? We Japanese have such a close one. It's a shame, Jin. Despite this outrage, blog Ivanova-san (yaponogovoryaschie invited) enjoys great popularity in Japan: for the year it was visited by over a million users. So what are they - these weird Russian?

To catch up and overtake the Shinkansen

First of all, it turns out that contrary to popular stereotype of Japanese people in the strict earflaps, Russian - people immediate and impulsive. Ivanova arrives in-law-san in Japan and goes to the station where it needs to go on a Japanese super express Shinkansen. Well, is not it, of course, and runs, because Russian made late. In late Shinkansen is not accepted, "Sliding Doors" - the train departs in the lilac distance. The hut is burning, the horses gallop - making in this situation Russian woman? That's right, is running for the world's fastest train on the platform and tries to open the sealed door. Japanese railway workers, overcoming cognitive dissonance and the speed of sound on the run trying to stop this outrage, but a ticket is "money Ploce". Kicking slender Japanese in-law continues to gain speed and knock on doors and windows Shinkansen ...

After hearing this story, my Japanese friends made big eyes: "But it's dangerous!" I had to explain that in the distant Soviet past my aunt took the children and her husband in his arms, stopped in this manner a jet plane. And stopped, word of honor!

Further, these strange Russian and cars go weird. When you do not know the way, Russian, stopping next to a taxi or bus and ask! In the presence of the navigator. Ivanova-san said case, her husband, lost, drove in such a manner to a taxi driver and asked for help. Good taxi driver, seeing the suffering foreigner, said: "You go for me." On the first turn driven, carried away by the scenery, I forgot about the drive and turned the other way. Japanese taxi driver, dutiful weights, then a half-day chase him ... Or this: in ancient times Russian lived in houses called "komunaruka" because too much living space - it's bad. Therefore, "komunaruka" - when an apartment you live strangers, can you imagine?

Here it is necessary digression. The Japanese are very cherished personal space. Let 8 square meters - but your own. The first year in Japan, I lived in a student dormitory. So, when a local affliction I was almost his own apartment: bedroom, kitchen, shower and toilet. And so everyone in the dorm. And to live in one room with strangers - well, as it Kurirofu-san?

Returning to the "komunarukam". There, the young husband Ivanova-san received from his neighbor Uradzimiru-san's an important lesson for Russian men: how to deal with a hangover. The word "hangover", by the way, there are also Japanese - "futsuka oy", literally - "the intoxication of the second day." But the word "booze" No, I had to explain descriptively: "It's such a long" futsuka oy "". To explain how Russian achieve such an effect, and most importantly - why they do it, we have to delve into the geography, talking about Bulgakov "treating like with like". Yes, the Russian drink to get rid of "the second day of intoxication." That's the dialectic, your turn.

And now is the time to once again feel proud of their country. In the fight against "futsuka oy" Uradzimiru-san was faced with an insurmountable obstacle - his hands were shaking. Pour some more turns, but to convey to his mouth - no longer exists. The solution was found ingenious. Uradzimiru-san wrapped with a right hand with a glass cloth, a towel hanging around his neck and pulled ... the free end of the left hand. Hand with a glass of rose and neck stabilized unwanted reciprocating ... Power in the Soviet Union was also a very exciting process, not something that is in present-day Japan. Buy, for example, canned beans with - and there stuffed! Or vice versa. Buy beans, knowing that there just beans, Russian, probably uninteresting. A canned themselves, by the way, were in short supply. Calling someone in-law Ivanova-san to work, they say, to the department store brought the deficit, so the entire department is running to the store to stand in line, and - unthinkable for a Japanese - Work stops!

More stereotypes

But it's all the jokes, and the book is written with great love for Russia. Keiko Ivanov tells about how the Soviet Union collapsed, and it is difficult to live when your country disappears. As the Soviet youth of the most dreamed of jeans. As the streets of Moscow ride buses with strange horns. And many other things, which significantly extends the standard set of "vodka-bear-balalaika".

Of course, Japanese is interesting only unusual, but the fact that we are quite normal people in between long "futsuka oy", remains outside the brackets. On the other hand, does not come to us unusual, we would not be interested in the other. And the life of a Russian husband, no one would have written a comic book, as they do not write about life with her husband, an American, for example. So what are some stereotypes can be easily converted into a brand. You just need something ... a little bit of self-irony. We, of course, a special way around, especially in the treatment of a hangover, but it is not necessary to treat this so seriously.

In connection with this - the last "anecdote", is already in my collection. During the war, tens of thousands of Japanese prisoners of war were in the Soviet camps. Among them was the grandfather of my friend at the institute. In captivity, he watched as his compatriots, one after another die of hunger, and realized that in order to survive, he has to learn the Russian language and become a translator in the camp. Now my grandfather 90 years, and he had forgotten not only native Japanese, but even the names of relatives. But the Russian language Soviet campers Yoshio Tsugawa not forgotten! And he lives in Hokkaido, because Tokyo is too warm. So we are with the Japanese closer to each other than it seems.